A small newspaper covering events that did not, technically, occur.

The NOAH Post is a daily satirical newspaper. Our stories are not real. Our reporters are not real. The town in which the story takes place is, usually, several towns laid carefully on top of each other.

We write in the deadpan voice of a small-town daily because the joke tends to land harder when the paper itself refuses to acknowledge that anything is funny. Our headlines describe what happened. Our bodies describe what happened in greater detail. Our readers are expected to do the rest.

We do not run stories about real, named individuals. We run stories about local man, area pastor, and senior adult, who, like all wire-service archetypes, do not technically exist.

If a story bothered you, we apologize, and we mean it. If a story bothered you and you suspect it was written specifically about you, we also apologize, and we mean it less.